April 2012
30 posts
Play
Anal Sex
43% of women have experienced anal sex.
this brings up a question i always want to ask people. it’s in 2 parts. answer the first part in your head before reading the second part.
1. do you enjoy/have you experienced anal sex or anal play?
well? did you answer that in your head? maybe you’re answer is ‘i haven’t tried it’ or ‘sometimes’. it doesn’t have to be yes or no, because the real question is the second part of this. i’m not gonna bold it so it doesn’t catch your eye too soon! 2. when you thought of ‘anal sex or anal play’ were you only considering whether you like it in/on your butt?
i’m not asking because i need to know, but because a lot of the time when this topic comes up among straight folks, it seems like people are only thinking of penises going into women’s butts. totally unscientific research, so maybe it is mostly women who make these assumptions. and i’d guess that queer people, as a statistical demographic, have a more inclusive idea of whose anus is at play.
‘have you ever had anal sex’ is a question i myself have been asked, and when i answered yes, but only as the person entering, people are like, ‘oh yeah’, like they totally forgot that men have assholes. honestly, i think a lot of the ways straight people act regarding sex makes not a lot of sense (i’m straight), and this is one of those situations that i’m like, really?
it makes so much more sense to me to pleasure a man with his own butt than mine! not that women don’t get pleasure from butt play, but since most men have prostates and most women don’t, it seems like if we’re just experimenting with butt stuff, putting my hands in his butt seems like the more sensible place to start.
any of this make sense?
The 4 Easiest Ways to Accidentally Ruin Your Relationship Read more: The 4 Easiest Ways to Accidentally Ruin Your Relationship →
cracked.com
once again, cracked tackles real subjects with humor. i heart them. though i wish i’d read this advice years ago.
#3: Being Too Controlling
Controlling people don’t just wake up one day and say, “Wow, my actions are affecting others in a negative way. I should really change that about myself right now. Here I go.”
#2: Not knowing how to argue
Instead of trying to resolve a conflict, they’re trying to “win” a verbal contest. Instead of expressing their point of view, they’re trying to bully the other into submission.
When things start to escalate, the words tend to get buried under tone, bad phrasings and the volume of your voice.
My Landlord and I, Every God Damn Time
- Me: Hey, sorry to bother you, but remember when you said that if the plumbing keeps acting up to call you? Well it keeps acting up.
- Landlord: Are you flushing maxi pads down the toilet?
- Me: No. Like I said last time, I haven't been doing that, so I don't think that's the problem...
- Landlord: Are you SURE you haven't been flushing maxi pads down the toilet?
- Me: Yes, I'm absolutely sure. Alright see the thing that keeps happening with the toilet is...
- Landlord: No, I don't believe you, you're flushing pads down the toilet.
- Me: .....
- Landlord: You know those tampons that say flushable really aren't.
- Me: .....
- Landlord: Just don't flush your pads down the toilet anymore and call me the next time something happens.
- Me: But you say that every time, and every time this conversation---
- Landlord: Talk to you later, sweetheart!
- Me: ......
- Me: ......
- Me: CAN ONE OF THE CIS GUYS WHO LIVES HERE PLEASE FUCKING TALK TO THIS GUY FOR ME?!
Play
“It is possible, sadly, to have sex without intimacy. But not kissing. There is a kind of symmetry to kissing that makes for the most elemental bonding between two people, a balance between assertion and vulnerability. Mouth on mouth, eyes confronting each other from mere centimeters apart. Hearts pressed to each other. A perfection of vulnerability and trust. Kissing is the highest form of art for the connoisseur of intimacy.”
—Randall Stickrod
libido for life
libido for life
on easter bunny origins →
lakeville.patch.com
In Europe, the hare is a nocturnal creature—until mating season, that is. Then, there are bunnies all over the place all day, in a frenzy of fertility.
The totem of Eostre is a hare—and according to the story, the goddess can turn into a hare at will. In one legend, the goddess comes upon an injured bird, who she saves by turning into a hare, it being the animal she is strongest as. Yet, having been a bird, this hare could still lay eggs, and in gratitude to the goddess, the bird laid colored eggs on her feast day ever since.
dear first response
my body does not know i’m pregnant before i do. i -am- my body. my body doesn’t know stuff. presumably, if it did know stuff, it would know i was pregnant the -moment- my egg was fertilized, which is still sooner than your product. why can’t you just be like, yo, our test works sooner.
Play
The 7 Boobiest Inventions For Breasts. Tits. →
cracked.com
The latest article on Cracked focuses on some of the most mammarily insane patents ever filed.
Leashing women to the sink for their own good.
This one isn’t just hilarious, it’s going to be meta-hilarious because they put “Sexism” in my title specifically to bring out the best in internet commenters. Who’ll explain how I’m a total hypocrite for both caring about equality AND noticing that breasts exist, and that people have thought about them.
i am completely confused as to why someone thought boobs needed special apparatus to be washed, not to mention insanely complicated scary apparatus.
also, the boob enhancement table is not entirely unlike something i dreamed up during my 10 year old’s imaginative, hours long, submissive fantasy solo-play.
“Enough ladies. I get it. You have periods.”
—
Two and a Half Men co-creator Lee Aronsohn’s tells THR he doesn’t much care for lady-centric sitcoms. (via newsweek)
He applauded women like Whitney Cummings, Chelsea Handler and Tina Fey securing a voice to discuss formerly taboo subjects on TV.
“But we’re approaching peak vagina on television, the point of labia saturation,” he added.
The current female TV boom contrasts with Two and a Half Men mostly portraying women as bimbos, something Aronsohn isn’t about to apologize for.
“Screw it… We’re centering the show on two very damaged men. What makes men damaged? Sorry, it’s women. I never got my heart broken by a man,” Aronsohn earlier told the Toronto conference during a keynote address.
(via synecdoche)
#ENOUGH DUDES. WE GET IT. YOU MASTURBATE. #ENOUGH DUDES. WE GET IT. YOU LIKE GETTING YOUR DICK SUCKED. #ENOUGH DUDES. WE GET IT. YOUR WIFE WITHHOLDS SEX. #ENOUGH DUDES. WE GET IT. #NO REALLY. #ENOUGH DUDES. #DONE. #WITH. #THEM.
(via falulatonks)
So essentially what you are saying is that women have nothing to say that doesn’t involve the fact that they have vaginas and periods, and that viewing audiences only want to see sad, lonely or promiscuous men on their tv screens?
That there’s no value in a show that centers around a woman? That men are the only people who watch television and you are tired of seeing strong, opinionated well-rounded female characters on your screen?
You, you my friend are in the wrong industry. You should be writing for superhero comics! ;)
(via karnythia)
these are the people that control the shows we watch on TV. Even when audiences literally demand different representation its like “nah, we’ll just talk about ourselves some more…”
(via newwavefeminism)
Translation: So once again, women are reduced to their reproductive organ and how they do or do not benefit men.
If a woman’s anatomy or any of the functions benefit male writers or their audience there is no reason to hear women or see women.
All women must have periods.
And in general, women can all shut the hell up.
(via queennubian)
most of tv is dominated by white men. how is that saturation of anything but white dick?
(via baddominicana)
i don’t think i’ve ever seen a menstrual joke on parks and recreation. it’s interesting how he would throw tina fey and chelsea handler in the same genre of comedy writer, since their actual focuses are totally different.
and men can be damaged by things other than broken fucking hearts. dad damage their sons all the time, and call me crazy, but i think war damages pretty much everyone it touches.
